Film Review: Avengers *SQUEALS*

I am a seal.

I just watched Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes.

Words cannot begin to explain.

And yet I am still going to write an entire blogpost.

I will not put any spoilers, but I will say you MUST go watch this movie. This is the BEST MOVIE I HAVE SEEN THIS YEAR. (funny, one of the best ones I saw last year also had Robert Downey Jr. in it – Sherlock Holmes 2: Game of Shadows.

I got into the theatre expecting to be disappointed (because for me nothing compares to Batman) but now I am scared for The Dark Knight Rises because Chris Nolan had BETTER have something fantastic up his sleeve, because,…ai yawa. For me, Marvel has really brought the heat, and this is saying a lot, because I am very definitively a DC kinda girl.

The only disappointing thing about this experience was the bathrooms. IMAX locks their loos so people who are considered randoms cannot get inside. They even have – get this – security locks with codes on them. Yeah. YEAH.

IMAX glasses are bearable (it was my first IMAX experience) although mine kept clouding, first because I thought they were dirty and then because I kept crying. Yes. Crying. I cried THREE TIMES. Twice from the sheer JOY of being in this cinema to watch that masterpiece. I have discovered that I am a seal and a child, as I kept clapping and exclaiming. Yes, I am that person. It was indescribable, people. I left wanting to be a hero. Cape and soundtrack and superheroey friends and everything. The whole shebang. The great caboose. (No?) The conductor was trying to pull some sh* on other people, I kept thinking I WISH a n* would try that stuff on me. Aki this movie is transcendent! It made me reconsider my life choices and sh*. IT MADE ME CRY! And LAUGH. And SQUEAL. And my legs were shaking after the movie, as if…well, you know. Seriously. It is that good. If I had appendages that could increase in length after excitement…if I could write a movie like that! They must have spent a FORTUNE on sets (I read the budget was 220 million, and the teaser/trailer broke the record for most downloaded trailer on ITunes Movie Trailer somethings) and…just…a fortune. Ok, I will later do a post on everything I loved about this movie, when I am sure you have all watched it. Ok, most of you…I love that everyone was focused on. That is ALL I am saying!!

I really liked this movie. Everything about it. The acting was on point. The villains were on point. The script, the keeping to the actors’ voices…on point (scriptwriters notice such things). The delivery/execution, the effects (I didn’t care much for the soundtrack, because I really was not listening, but if it was awful, I would have noticed). The screen was HUGE! I felt the sound through my feet. Dude. But making a good movie takes so much, though. Production is kind of a b*…you can have a great script but crap editors (some Kenyan tv), or a great actor but crap music (soaps and/or Nigerian flicks), or crap story but great actors (Jumping the Broom) or cliché storyline with cliché bad actors (Death Race)…I could go on and on…

I think humans are so amazing! For thinking up such things. I DESPERATELY want to be Iron Man (at some point in the movie I was thinking of revisiting my childhood dream of doing a degree in Mathematics so I could be a genius and make things like that). Also, I must start reading more comic books. Anyone?

Go. Go now. Take your friends. Start a campaign. I’ll contribute 20 bob to your cause, I swear. I hope you like it. 😀 You will probs meet me there, because I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo seeing it again.

It gets about a 47 out of 10.


p.s. I will review The Lorax and Hotel Clarion in the next post. I was supposed to, but Avengers moved me. What can I say.

28 thoughts on “Film Review: Avengers *SQUEALS*

  1. IRON MAN! THE HULK! BLACK WIDOW!!!! Wait, did I really have a favourite?? Just realised I was going to list almost everyone! Pepper Potts! How cool is she?? Is this comment even coherent?? I can't tell coz I can't quite think straight! & I think the exclamations after black widow have something to do with how HOT ScarJo was/is…etc etc! I have about 5 or so dvds with Marvel comics. Let's talk.

  2. Also, make sure you tell me when you go for the 2nd 'take' coz I feel like I didn't experience it as I should have…kind of like a drug that makes you lose awareness of what's going on thus robbing you of the joys it's supposed to give…I WANT MOAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Seriously? Spongebob Squarepants beats Troy. Troy? That confused jumble of action sequences?
    I saw the trailer for Avengers when I went to watch John Carter and after the trailer I was soo sure I was going to see Avengers twice. On Friday, me and Avengers have our first date.

  4. You betcha!!! Same day I said I would do. I had this plan on Labours day see…and because it was raining crazy, my plan was even tighter ..seee….
    I went for 6 ish show…bana sold out and only managed to get the front row seats . Damn!!!!
    Lakini it was deadly !!!! Your move DC..ur move

  5. yo, chick, you owe me 20bob. Went last week Wednesday and going again this weekend. I think a rainy weekday is best coz you get to sit anywhere you want and centreback is the best place to get the full experience.

    Sadly, I don't think I will ever enjoy a 2D movie ever again. Goodbye westgate. Adios Village Market. It was heaven while it lasted. I weep for my lost innocence.

    Best Line.

    Cap: Stark, we need a plan of attack.
    Buckethead: I do have a plan: Attack!

    Do I get 40bob if I go twice?

  6. Now where will i find you? :o)

    I wanna go again Sato. Waiting for those friends who must see it with me lol.

    I…don't…really…like…3D, though. Like, it hurts my eyes…

    Other best line:
    Loki: This is ridiculous! I am a GOD! You are BENEATH ME-
    Hulk: Puny God.


  7. …that was the most disrespectful fight scene I have ever seen. From then on, I felt so sorry for poor Loki that I started supporting him. If I were him, I'd pack up my world domination plans and go be a priest or something.

    I have been converted to 3D. Went to watch transformers 3 at Sarit and I don't know what was worse. That stupid movie or the way that 3D looked like cardboard cutouts stuck on the screen. That was my angriest afternoon in 2011

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