in the still

Maybe I want you to come after me so that I don’t feel like I’m the only one here, talking to myself on a cold tin roof. Because I stopped believing in unconditional love a long time ago – I’m incapable of it, so I don’t expect it in return. I’m too impatient. Too sensitive. […]

Truth

When I people watch, I’m usually trying to decide if people are happy. No making up elaborate stories about their inheritances or sex lives, unless they have a super obvious pointer to either, but whether they have contentment. Whether the chubby mother running after her chubby baby really wanted said baby, or if in the […]

The first time

You never want to admit to a spark. Sometimes because it’s always scary to admit to feeling to anything that makes you vulnerable. But also because sometimes you shouldn’t be admitting it. You shouldn’t feel the way you feel…even if you haven’t fully described it. Or maybe that’s what everyone says. And everyone knows sparks […]

Variant

She said: Is it not agony, knowing that you will never, ever be the perfect child your mother had hoped; hoped that after carrying you for 9 months you would be the angel she’d always wanted? You will never make her choices, even though she desperately wishes you would. You’ll never love her God, her […]

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