when

When his ex who was your best friend before they fucked starts
following you on Instagram and your
natural reaction, of course is to
look through her pictures and see if she’s ugly yet, or lost that slight mboch flavour you knew well and loved, if the
burning desert sun has worked wrinkles into her smile, or the
food over there has made her bloated and obscene
And then when
he follows you too and even though it’s been like a
decade in millennial years the
bile still rises in your throat like what the
FUCK was I thinking when I opened myself up to this
wannabe asshole lunatic who had no idea what to do with this
body and mind and soul that is intricate like a
Hindu temple, like a forest dryad shrine, like a still Narcissus inspiring river, what the
FUCK
When you think about how after what’s been like a decade in millennial years you should
probably let go because that break up has hurt longer than some of your closest friendships and there’s just no more
room for it in your temple because you’re
expanding and loving and living and
it needs to end. 
You’re still not going to follow him back though. 
(because what the ACTUAL FUCK)

One thought on “when

Leave a Reply