Film: Mockingjay

Don’t read this if you liked the movie Mockingjay.

Don’t bother with the movie if you loved the books.

Don’t bother with this review if you liked the last movies.

So I loved the Hunger Games books. I think Suzanne Collins is great and everyone should be reading her stuff instead of E. L. James. Although clearly people are reading her stuff and turning it into a movie that has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH THE BOOK.

Ok I exaggerate. It started like the book and kind of sort of ended like the book but it wasn’t the book.

The problem with consistently having a book comparison, however, is that nothing will ever really be like the book unless it is LOTR or Harry Potter 1 so I am going to move on from ALL THE NUANCES THEY COMPLETELY IGNORED FROM THE BOOK LIKE SNOW’S OBSESSION WITH WHITE ROSES OR KATNISS’ ACTUAL BADASSERY and move on to a(n attempted unbiased) critique of the movie.

This movie sucked.

Lol.

Mockingjay is the fourth and final, thank goodness, instalment in the Hunger Games franchise by Suzanne Collins about how a girl, Katniss, becomes the revolutionary mascot for an entire world.

Seriously. Lulling at the beginning. Lulling in the middle. Lulling at the end. Boringly predictable lines. A heroine who I like less and less (did she REALLY think no one would notice her leaving the base camp? Seriously). A ‘hero’ whose get up and go got up and went (much like Robin Jones Gunn in The Princess Bride, one of my absolute favourite movies of all time. She was the ONLY flaw). A hot antihero. A shock value evil being. A huge Grandmaster plan on the part of the villains that is an infeasible yawnfest. Chases through tunnels that felt like something pulled from a weak Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie. Another hot guy dying. Brief splashes of strange people to help along the way – because that’s how all quests go – good grief, I am jaded – and just general meh-ness.

…seriously?

I wonder if my buddy Suzanne liked it. Because I thought it was weak af. It gets a 5 from me.

Did I already say it was meh?

 

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